“You’re getting fat. You’re not pretty enough.
No one’s ever going to love you. You’re a failure.”
I’d never let anyone speak to me like that, so why do I allow my inner voice to say these things repeatedly, on a daily basis? Why do I let my inner critic get away with it?
Hi guys, so today I wanted to write about something I have serious problems with, something until recently I never thought I’d get rid of and until now has been a daily battle with what my personality on the outside portrays and what the voice on the inside picks up on.
I’m sure each and every one of us has gone through it, has had that little voice in our heads saying we look fat in the new skirt we bought or that our skin is looking horrible and so we shouldn’t bother leaving the house. I know I’m not the only one who has these fleeting thoughts but it got me thinking… why the hell am I allowing the inside me make the outside me feel like sh*t?!
Like seriously, I’d say overall I’m a pretty confident person but wow – if you could here the things my inner critic says, you’d be surprised.
I’m constantly picking flaws, be it with my appearance or with my work. Self critique is important and something that done the right way is super helpful but simply having your internal voice saying how bad everything is is the complete opposite.
Recently I’ve been trying to change my mind set, making a choice to listen to the helpful and block out the negative.
Now don’t get me wrong, I’m far from having this perfected. It takes a long time to re-train your brain but the small steps I’ve already made has had such a huge impact on my day to day mood, mindset and overall productivity. For example, I was going to meet someone for drinks the other night. I showered, did my hair and makeup – the usual. Before I left I looked in the mirror and…sighed *STOP* this was the moment. The moment my inner critic would usually pipe up saying “ugh, well you’ve done your best” but just before it could I stared in the mirror and said “you look great.”
Now I don’t know if that one simple, tiny change in my mentality was the reason for it, but I went on to have an amazing night.
I think with the world of social media and online lifestyles, it’s so easy to compare yourself to others. I know I do it and I’m pretty sure most of you guys do too. It’s one of those things that we know we shouldn’t do, we know it’ll only make us feel worse about ourselves and yet still…we do it anyway. Some kind of satanic ritual we force upon ourselves *eye roll*
But hey, let me tell you – as an Instagrammer/influencer/blogger, whatever people like to call me. My life online, especially on Instagram may seem like I have my sh*t together but guys come on, I totally don’t! I often ponder the question… does anyone? I mean if you do, props to ya! But me – nope, NOT AT ALL.
Saying that, I have grown and seeing how far I’ve come in all aspects of my life in the past few years is something I’m pretty happy with. But this, this voice that so often turns my good days into bad is my latest opponent and one I fully intend to KO (Knock Out.)
Jumper c/o – Boden, Trousers c/o – Boden, Shoes c/o – Boden, Glasses c/o – Glasses Direct
Photography – Zoe Griffin
So yes, that’s my little update. My little heart to heart that I hope you can relate to. At the moment every time I feel that negative voice entering my head I quickly think of a positive affirmation to combat it with. Let me know if this is something you struggle with too and if you have any tips/tricks to saying Bye Felicia to your inner critic.
These pictures are pretty
Thank you! Zoe is a fabulous photographer! Kate xx